Let’s face it, all of our favorite heroes from RPGs tend to dress a bit… creatively. That’s really just a nice word to use because some of those characters make bold fashion choices that would make Lady Gaga blush. They may not be in meat dresses, but the odd fascination with RPG characters having way too many belts will always be weird.
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It’s hard to focus on villains looking to destroy the world when the main heroes look like they’re ready to get a fresh start with the circus. I’m certainly not giving out fashion tips anytime soon, but clearly, neither are any of these RPG characters.
10Kingdom Hearts
Just… what in the world is literally every character in these games wearing? Each and every character is dressed so anime cool that it physically hurts my soul. The games may all be aboutthe power of friendshipor something like that, but I don’t know, real friends would tell Sora and Riku that those fits aren’t it.
Even worse, all the bad guys look like they’re ready to get caught in the rain and stink of thick leather the entire time. I’ve seen some of thoseKingdom Heartslocations, those leather coats can not be comfortable in some of those climates.
9Final Fantasy 10
I guess you can kind of argue that Yuna and Lulu’s outfits make sense inFinal Fantasy 10because they are a bit more flowy and magical. When you look at literally anyone else, though, it’s a wonder how any of them think they’re fit to go on any kind of adventure.
The unintentionally funniest of the bunchare Wakka and Tidus, but I didn’t even need to name Tidus, because we all already knew he’s got a lot of issues he needs to take a look at. I feel like letting out an awkward Tidus laugh every time I see what he has on because he has to be the goofiest-looking Final Fantasy lead ever created.
8Persona 5
We all love somePersona 5, and the characters do look cool in an aesthetic sense, but fully leather-clad is never gonna work. They may have no control over it, and the style may be thanks to their inner rebel, but that doesn’t mean we can’t goof on their look a little bit.
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Everyone’s probably got a bit of leather in their inner rebel, but that doesn’t mean we should all go for it. The Phantom Thieves want to steal everyone’s hearts, but I’m wondering which group of thieves stole their fashion sense. Queue the ‘oh snap’ sirens on that one.
7Tales Of Symphonia
Everyone’s clothes inTales Of Symphoniaare so pointy, and everyone’s hair is so anime. Lloyd is even wearing suspenders – the guy isn’t even a farmer; what is he doing wearing suspenders?The whole castjust takes some bold swings with fashion, and I don’t know if any of us can get behind it.
Just look at what Regal has on. My main man over here has gone ahead and shown off the midriff just so he can show the entire world his killer abs. I don’t know if that’s a fashion sin or not, but it feels like it probably should be.
6Chrono Cross
I just don’t know what to make of all the choices of theChrono Crosscast. It’s like they tried to dress like normal characters, got so close, and yet something incredibly small about everything is off, and no one can put their fingers on it. They look like aliens pretending to be real people.
I don’t know who told Serge that matching his bandana to his purple socks was a good idea, but I’m gonna go out on a limb and say purple socks are never a good idea. Maybe the whole cast is just braver than me, and I don’t get the fashion. Then again, probably not.
5Valkyria Chronicles 4
I think the best way to describeValkyria Chronicles 4is as army-chic. What that actually means is anyone’s guess, but it fits the weird fashion over function gear that the characters in this game decide to take into active war situations with them.
They may not look as ridiculous assome other RPG characters, but the idea of ‘war, but make it fashion’ probably isn’t going to fly with most people. Some of these guys look like they’re Chip Hazard and the rest of his small soldiers.
4Tales Of Vesperia
Absolutely none of these characters look normal. Yuri is out here showing off his whole chest, with the only saving grace being that the game doesn’t take place in the seventies. Judith is basically wearing a swimsuit as armor, and the group has a tiny pirate with them.
That’s without mentioning the bizarre clothing decision that Karol has made, though he does get a bit of a pass because he is still a kid, and I didn’t even know how to dress properly until I turned twenty. It’s a learning process, so maybe Karol will figure it out if he ditches Brave Vesperia.
3Final Fantasy 7 Remake
Credit must be given where it’s due,Aerith and Barretboth look so cool, so they are excused from this. I really don’t know what Cloud and the rest of Avalanche are doing. Cloud’s walking around in a sleeveless sweater, and Tifa constantly wheres shorts and a small tank top despite being from a mountain town. Don’t even get me started on the random cowboy outfit; nothing makes sense.
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Then there’s the big bad himself, Sephiroth. The man really woke up and decided to dress like an antagonist long before he became one. No one can have hair that long and a coat that emo and not turn into a giant-snake-impaling, mind-whispering bad guy.
2Earthbound
I’ll admit it; I’m not above critiquing the fashion choices of the group of kids fromEarthbound. Paula looks pretty normal, but what the rest of those kids are doing is a good question. Who told Ness that a striped shirt was a good look? Everyone looks bad in striped shirts, and I’m no different. I’m in one right now so I’m speaking from experience.
I will also cut the hilariously named Poo some slack because he’s just ready for combat in the GI, even if the top knot is a rough choice for everyone. Jeff is out here looking like he wants to be James Bond without having ever seen James Bond before. I respect the hustle, but that doesn’t mean it’s good.
1Yakuza: Like A Dragon
The handful of characters fromYakuza: Like A Dragoncan make some seriously bold fashion choices, but none of them are great. That seems to be the point, but come on, Ichiban Kasuga could have tried a bit harder.
It might actually be Kasuga’s hair that throws off the whole look, but the same can’t be said for Saeko Mukoda, Tianyou Zhao, or Koichi Adachi. On the bright side, they look like real people, which reminds me how hard looking good can be if you don’t know what you’re doing.
